By: Tyler Shelton Recent history has given way to innumerable revolutions in the expectations which society places on people from nearly all facets of American life. These shifts have origins dating as far back to moments like in 1848 with the Declaration of Sentiments advocating for equality among women in the nation. These revolutions persist even into modern day, where the focus is now placed on people of color and the LGBTQ+ community resisting the expectations of an oppressive status quo. Yet in this status quo men have seemingly played the role of enforcers, serving as the enemy to revolution and wider progress. They wear masks of indifference both to the sentiments of the wider world and their own sensitivities. Jennifer Siebel Newsom’s The Mask You Live In set out to look beneath the surface of masculine fronts in boys of all ages. In doing so, it provided striking insight into how they are also victims of the status quo and societal expectations, not merely apathetic enforcers. Beneath the mask, boys are human. They yearn to truly love as much as they yearn to truly be loved. The film argues that one of the most damaging pieces of our current idea of masculinity is the need to drown out one’s more emotional and vulnerable thoughts or actions. Even at a young age, femininity is to be shamed. It is to be repressed. If one admits their fears and insecurities, they lose any hope of “fitting in.” They lose any hope of being considered “one of the guys.” They lose any hope of ever being a “man.” Yet restricting these boys from ever unloading their emotional baggage leaves them carrying immense weight in silence. These children suffer from abusive households, questions of their sexuality and identity, and countless other burdens like any other human being. But boys are expected to shoulder it. Emotional weight is piled repeatedly onto weary souls, depleted of energy from carrying these problems for years and denied any place to release it. Can it truly be taken as any surprise that when they finally unload their baggage, it comes in the form of violence and not words? Mass homicides instead of therapy for past and current trauma? Domestic abuse instead of counseling for stronger relationships? The documentary argues that our current society simply sets these boys up to explode in nearly every facet of their lives. It begins with the toys they play with as little children, carrying through to the video games they consume as adolescents and even the porn they are exposed to at nearly any point in their lives.
The film presents a strong case that the message we currently send boys must change if such violence and trauma is to cease. In this, the movie argues, we may all play a role. What’s needed, now more than ever, is a deconstruction of our current image of masculinity as tough and dominant above everyone around us. There can be maturity and peace found in promoting intimate relationships and expressing one’s vulnerabilities, and it’s something every boy needs to hear from their family, their friends, their community, and their society, whether they realize it or not. In building the right environments which allow boys to remove their masks, we can see beneath them. Beneath the mask, everyone yearns to be accepted for who they truly are. Responding to this need, it seems, is not a matter of if, but when. The Mask You Live In understands that we all may have played some part in maintaining this archaic status quo. However, just as we’ve done innumerable times in the past for other groups, we can all play a part in revolutionizing what it means to “be a man.”
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